MAMA: Adventures in Martial Arts and Motherhood

It was a Friday night 6 years ago when Amy first walked into the dojo. We were barely open, in fact I am pretty sure my husband was driving nails into drywall at the exact moment she entered. Still, there we were, post Friday night sparring class, hands wrapped, faces sweaty. At the time Amy lived above the dojo, and she was excited to finally see the old abandoned deli turn into something. She walked in, all smiles, eager to find out about us, and was met at the door with a handshake and a "Shhh, there's a baby sleeping in the corner."  That baby, was my daughter, Maya, and she, like the Columbus Avenue dojo, was brand new. That Friday she dozed in her Pack & Play in the corner of the room, completely oblivious to the heated battles that were playing out on the floor nearby. It was not the first, nor would it be the last time she slept in the dojo. Our female students may remember tiptoeing around a small toddler  on Saturday afternoons,  napping on a mat on the fl...

Good morning. There's that silly dojo clock again. I am not saying that was when we finished promotion necessarily. Its just a clock. Who knows when I took that picture? Could have been months ago... (It was last night. Right after the bear went to sleep.)  You know that show Lost? Where they are all stranded on that island and they have to deal with that smoke monster and those Others and learning all about each other and all that? Yeah, like that. Well, without the horrific plane crash. Tomorrow I will have a lot to write. After our students are all done sparring and we sit down with a cold beer to celebrate.  For now, lets just say that I had fun out there last night.  Which, for me, was the perfect way to finish this whole roller coaster of an experience. Also, I know belts aren't supposed to matter. But this one is really pretty. I am very proud of myself. I am very proud of all of us. It was meaningful, in many, many ways, which you will hea...

There is a old Chinese proverb that goes "May you live in interesting times". It is generally considered a curse. When I was weighing in my mind whether or not I wanted to participate in another karate promotion, one of the things I thought was that I wanted the event to be "meaningful". I didn't want it to just be about getting another stripe on my belt. But by meaningful, I clearly meant "I want this event to be mentally and physically challenging but not so much so that it isn't also totally fun at all times. I want to be required to perform well, but only if I feel one hundred percent in body and mind."  In other words, I want it to be a meaningful experience, in exactly the way that I am most comfortable with. On Wednesday night, one of my fellow Senseis asked me how I was feeling. I made this whole profound speech about making my peace with my shoulder being hurt and with not feeling like the me I was 7 years ago. I made that speech l...

Sometimes, when I am trying to come up with things to blog about, I reread my old posts. I suppose you could say it gives me perspective. Sometimes I reread my old posts for no other reason than because I can. (Meeeeeeeeee!) This morning, while browsing through March of 2013, I realized that I am, much like Bill Murray in Groundhog Day, about to relive the exact same week all over again.  Last year, at this time, there was a Sensei/Kyoshi promotion going on. Maya was getting ready for Career Day at her school. Chloe (the dog) was trying to eat my breakfast. (http://mamommyarchives.blogspot.com/2013/03/a-dog-career-day-and-other-randomness.html) Today is March 24th. This afternoon Maya and I are going to splatter paint on one of my old shirts so she can wear it this Wednesday for Career Day. (This year, she wants to be an artist.) And then, Wednesday evening, we begin another Sensei/Kyoshi promotion. Another year, another bear to subdue. (http://mamommyarchives.blogspot.com/2013...

With all this karate promotion stuff going on, it has been awhile since I climbed up onto my soapbox to preach to the 20 of you who read this blog. Its not that I do not have an opinion about Chris Christie or where that damn airplane is, I have just been too busy working on my sai kata to write about it.  But don't worry, this post is not about either of those topics.  My daughter likes to bring things to school to use with her friends at lunchtime. Toys are not allowed, so usually she brings a book to share, or her journal, which she often allows her friends to write in. (I used to do this too!) She adds this to her homework folder, her notebook, her book baggie (a plastic ziplock bag full of school books) and 2 or 3 snacks. All of this adds up to a bulging backpack that makes her look more like she is about to hike up the Appalachian Trail than attend first grade.  Every morning we have the same discussion: Maya: "Mama can I bring this to school today?...

Sometimes I notice things that I am not sure other people notice. For example, yesterday I got onto the bus and immediately realized that there was no one else on it. This bus, the B39, only makes 3 stops, just over the Williamsburg Bridge and back, so it is never particularly crowded. Where I get on is its first stop, and it is not unusual for me to be the only one there. Still, as I sat down in my seat, I was acutely aware of being all alone with the bus driver. The male bus driver. Don't get me wrong, I do not think there is much chance of the guy coming out from behind the steering wheel to attack me. But that did not stop me from A, noticing that we were alone together, and B, immediately figuring out what I would do if he did. (I am pretty sure it involved a rear naked choke. And a back flip off the roof. Parkour!) We reached the next stop two minutes later and 5 other people got on, thereby ending my little James Bond fantasy. But it made me wonder. Do other people ...

About a year ago, I watched two very talented gentlemen perform at their Kenshikai Kyoshi (5th degree black belt) promotion. I wrote about them here.   I also said that after watching them I realized that I had no interest in ever taking another promotion. Ever. Yesterday, I posted this on Facebook:  Yeah that is an invitation to attend promotion. Addressed to me. For the end of this month. I didn't lie. As of 6 months ago, I was pretty certain that when the time came for me to receive this invitation, I would respectfully decline.  It is an honor to be asked go for promotion. But I felt that I was not the student I was 7 years ago when I went for Sensei. I didn't train like those other guys. I was more focused on teaching. And to be honest, I was often far more interested in perfecting my arm bar, than in working on my katas. And all that was fine. After 25 years of karate, my training should have changed. I shouldn't be the same person I was before....