Sexy Bee

Yesterday I had one of those classic mommy exchanges. You know, the kind all the bloggers talk about. The kind in all the magazines. It was a holiday weekend so Maya was home from school all day. There was a man in my house installing cabinets at 9am. I had burny, itchy eyes and a sinus headache. Worse of all, I have been suffering from terrible insomnia for a couple of days, which always results in me becoming anxious and prone to obsessive thinking and random panic attacks. I was tired. I was stressed. I was distracted. But I wasn't hiding out in the closet. I wasn't lying in bed with my teddy bear. Nope, I was going about my day, anxiety and all. I took the dog to the park. I took Maya to the playground. We had lunch. When we got home from lunch, Maya wanted to play dress-up so I let her wear my old "sexy bee" Halloween costume. (On me it is a short, strapless black and yellow striped dress that hits about mid thigh. It came wrapped in a photo of a voluptuous woman, clad in bee dress, fishnets and stilletos. Needless to say, my five year old had skipped this part of the outfit.)

Around mid afternoon, we went to the movie theater next door to see Epic. Maya asked if she could wear the bee dress. I said sure.

Listen people, I have had about ten hours of sleep in two days. My mind is racing with all kinds of helpful thoughts like what if I never sleep again, what if I can't make it through the day, what if I DIE??? (Ok I never had that last thought, I am not that bad. But still. ) But I am taking my child to see a movie and giving her a fun day. I am super mommy!

Maya met a buddy of hers inside and the two girls shared popcorn and giggled and held each others hands during the scary parts and generally had a fantastic time. I zoned out and watched the pretty colors and loud noises. (Don't ask me what Epic is about.) It was nice. 

As we were leaving the theater a helpful lady stopped me. 
"She needs to pull up her dress."
Or yeah, the five year old in the adult sized sexy bee dress who is currently flashing her nips for all of Brooklyn.
" Its not a real dress," I explained. "Its just a dress up dress. It doesn't stay up but thanks."
I turned to my child who was happily dancing around the lobby with her friend, dress halfway down her belly. "Maya, pull up your dress."

My daughter gave me a dirty look and yanked it back up towards her neck, where it immediately drifted downwards again.

Thankfully, the lady left without another comment.
Here is what I didn't say:

We live right next door to the movie theater. Once I came here in my pajamas.
Normally my child wears real clothes. But on this day where I wasn't at my best it was easier to just let her keep the bee dress rather than go to the effort of changing. 
Maya is five, who cares if her boobs are showing?
She looks cute in that dress.
She is freaking HAPPY! She is having the time of her life right now. 
I am a great f-ing mom!
F- you lady.

The moral of this story is simple. You never know what kind of day someone is having. Half the women I know struggle with some kind of anxiety or panic issue, some more serious than others. Thankfully mine is only occasional. Most of my days are stress-free and happy, which I am thankful for. Almost all of these women are moms and for us some days the sun is shining, the birds are chirping and we walk out the door singing like Merry Poppins. Other days the sun is shining but inside your mind there is a raging thunderstorm. On those days, we all still get our child fed, clothed and out the door. We clean the house. We go to work. We interact with our spouses and family members. Perhaps we drink a little extra coffee and a bit more wine that day. Some of us may even take a pill or two (I don't, but I know plenty who do and good for them for taking care of themselves!) 

We are all awesome! Who cares what our kids are wearing??
I am awesome. Tired, but awesome.

Here's to all you awesome mommies out there! I am totally rockin that bee dress today!


  1. Unisom always works for me— but I'm sure you've tried it. I wish you an awesome night of uninterrupted awesome sleep tonight!


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